Once there was a boy/girl. His/her name was
Krian. Krian's brother's name was Andrew. Andrew was dumb. Krian was dumber.
He had a problem. All he did was go, "Ruff, I kill a dog." It got kind of
old.
So Andrew made up the "Kill a Goat" song and Krian loved it. But, after two
years, Krian finally tackled the song, and it drove everyone nuts. So he
killed a toaster on the beach instead.
The ground began to shake. Krian's intestines burnt until they were fried.
His mom screamed. Mrs. Shippy screamed. Mr. Shippy said, "Oy doy."
Krian said his first new words. "Who are you?"
The Shippies gurgled and gassed. "We are your great-great-great-relatives.
(Actually, we taught your mom to scream.)"
The three adults went, "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!"
Krian decided to have a make over luncheon with Carla (his ex girl-kid).
He put on makeup. Then his mom Barb belched really loud and Bevin was born.
Just then a sock went flying through Bull. Bull's fake name was Carla. "I'm
here!" she yelled.
Carla had a pink face with green pimples and blue spiked hair. She used lipstick
on only every other lip and had applied eye shadow and blush in opposite
places. One eye was died orange, and the other was stapled shut. Krian thought
she was the most gorgeous thing in the world. Yuck.
"Full Barb poo ahead!" Bevin yelled.
"Shut up, you turd!" Krian shouted.
"I am not a turd!" Bevin lied, for in actuality, he was one. A Barby one.
For their romantic date, Krian and Carla decided to explore their house.
(Krian had only been allowed in the bathroom all his 45 years. He slept there,
ate there, and exercised there.) But first they flushed Bevin down the toilet
and locked it.
Bevin went/wrote like this: ByEt@cOmRaEmIeOwN.. He went into a cat's belly.
The cat was Carla's. It had earrings, eye shadow, and was a fluffy dog. It
ate and barfed bananas, so Bevin mutated into a brown mushy poo-nana. He
flew to Bombay on a spaceship and mauled 18 people there. He decided to rent
a condo and spend his life relaxing in the desert.
THE END
****Afterward****
Bevin had lots of plastic surgery to make him a person. He changed his name
to Gary Bolivia, and he and his ugly wife both maul people east of Bombay
and west. But mostly Western kids.