DEER MEEGAN,
DO YOU REMEMBER ‘KILL A GOAT' SONG? I SANG IT TODAY FOR MY MUSIC CLASS
AT SCHOOL. THEY KILLED ME. IT FELT GOOD. DO YOU EVER FEEL GOOD? MURDER IS
THE WAY TO GET HIGH!
I SAW THIS THING ON THE INTERNET. IT SAID, "I LOVE BARNEY, HE'S MY GUY, HE
MAKES ME FEEL LIKE A FRENCH FRY. . ." ISN'T THAT COOL DUD? RING AROUND THE
ROSY, MAN.
MY HAIR TURNED BROWN TODAY. THEN IT TURNED PURPLE. THEN IT FELL OFF. IT WAS
WHITE AFTER THAT CAUSE I ATE IT. IT MAKES GOOD MEDICINE FOR YOU TO GET ZITS.
MY MOMMY TOLD ME SO. ISN'T THAT COOL DUD? POCKET FULL OF POSY, MAN!
HORSES RUN AT 10 MILES IN 20 HOURS. THAT MAKES 20 MILES AN HOUR RIGHT? I
LOVE MATH CAUSE I AM GOOD AT IT. WHEN I WAS ONLY 40 I ALREADY KNEW THAT 2
+ 2 = 90. NOW I AM 500 AND SKIPPED TO KINDERGARTEN. ISN'T THAT COOL YOU MILK
DUD? ASHES ASHES, MAN!
MY HOUSE IS A VERY VERY VERY FINE HOUSE. WITH TWO ZULES IN THE YARD LIFE
USED TO BE SO HARD. NOW LIFE STINKS BECAUSE OF YOU. HA HA HA. WE ALL FALL
DOWN, MAN!
FIND THE HIDDEN SONG. IF YOU DO, I WILL STEAL $59.99 FROM THE BANK AND GIVE
IT TO YOU FOR A PRIZE. THAT IS COOL. I LOVE ERNIE. HE CAN SING AND SNORE.
I LOVE BARBIE. SHE CAN OOH AND AAH. I LOVE BERT. HE CAN SUCK AND SQUEEZE.
I LOVE BIG BIRD. HE CAN SPIT AND SQUIRT. AND I LOVE surge! IT TASTES LIKE
TOILET WATER. THAT IS COOL.
MY MOMMY WANTS ME TO WAKE UP NOW, SO I HAVE TO GO. I'LL SEE YOU ON WEDNESDAY
READY OR NOT. CAN WE PLAY KISS THE FROG OR TORTURE CAMP? PLEEEEEAAAAASE????
YOUR CRANKY FRIEND, BULLL